this is beyond fucking creepy. turn the fucking camera off and enjoy the meal.
you guys are in a three-way relationship with your video camera.
i've been accused of being in love with my guitar, so i sort of get it. it's weird to be jealous of inanimate objects, but they get in the way. personally? i really do love my guitar more. it's taken me a long time to understand that.
the only thing that's really important to keep in mind about making choices is to be honest with yourself when you're making them. really honest.
honestly. he's sitting in a restaurant enjoying a meal with his girlfriend, and he pulls out a camera and motions for the world to eat with them. this is too ridiculous to be believable. it's the behaviour of a character in a jim carrey film.
there may be some kind of ocd or something setting in, granted, but in the end choosing between your partner and yourself is not always an obvious choice. sometimes, the right choice is yourself.
Jake
Or maybe 'Vlogging' is their job and how they make money, so they try to include as much of what they do as possible so it makes an interesting video for people to watch.
Nah that must be too much of a simple answer as to why they do it, huh? It's got to be an illness and he has to be choosing it over here (Even though they both film things). Yup that sounds right... Not.
deathtokoalas
it's pretty obvious from her body language that she's finding it invasive, and feeling like she's competing with the vlog for attention.
i mean, you could ask her, if she's willing to be that forthright in public, which she probably isn't - and then you'd know, rather than needing to read into it. but sometimes that kind of formality is kind of just that.
i pointed out the dinner section as something that's legitimately whacked. but watch when he takes a u-turn down the alley to talk to the camera. that's an "i thought we were walking" look.
if you take a step back from the "they vlog for a living" thing, like, realize that work getting in the way is a pretty common point of relationship failure, and it's usually something you have to accept rather than something that can be "fixed".
Jake
But you're just guessing on all of this and you can't be sure as you're just seeing things that you think she 'means' with her body language. It's their job to film themselves, they choose to do it, she chooses to do it. If she isn't feeling it then she shouldn't keep doing it.. But when the cheques come in I bet she doesn't mind how 'invasive' it is.
deathtokoalas
well, sure, i'm guessing. that's kind of obvious. but what i'm getting across is that the tensions appear to be stemming from whether she wants to keep doing this or not. it's not such an easy choice to just walk off, either.
Jake
Well no it is a pretty easy choice. She was a nurse before this (I believe, not too sure) so she won't have huge trouble getting another job. But if she isn't happy then she needs to walk away and if not, put in place things where they won't film in certain places. Otherwise she needs to get over it and if the relationship problem is to do with the camera, then it's down to them to decide to take a break or stop to keep the relationship healthy.
deathtokoalas
that is indeed the process that appears to be playing itself out. but what i meant was that walking away from a partner of many years is not reducible to an economic decision the way you're suggesting that it is.
Jake
I wasn't talking about walking away from her partner. I was talking about stopping Vlogging if it's getting in the way. And she can stop him vlogging at dinner by telling him that isn't something she wants. She also does vlogs of her own when they're apart and with friends, so it can't be in the way that much either.
deathtokoalas
it sounds quite simple in the abstract, doesn't it? i do hope they work out what each of them want.
Jake
Could easily be put into place... But she's not asking for it as she doesn't want it or she wouldn't vlog when she's away from him. Simple.
deathtokoalas
i don't think your logic here is very sound. that's kind of like saying that if you really want family dinners then you won't eat lunch at work.
Jake
How is it like that? If she enjoys vlogging then she enjoys it. If she sometimes wants dinners without it then she needs to tell him and sort it out. Either way, it's her problem and lack of communication from HER that's causing it, not his fault.
deathtokoalas
i'm not really trying to assign fault. it's not something where somebody has done something "wrong" and should be "blamed" for it.
but, communicating these sorts of things isn't always easy. sometimes people don't react well. and sometimes that's predictable.
Jake
'honestly. he's sitting in a restaurant enjoying a meal with his girlfriend, and he pulls out a camera and motions for the world to eat with them. this is too ridiculous to be believable. it's the behaviour of a character in a jim carrey film' A quote from your earlier reply to somebody. So you are assigning blame, to him. Like I said though, that's her lack of being able to communicate, if she can't speak to her bf and tell him something they shouldn't be together really if they can't talk.
deathtokoalas
no, i'm not assigning any kind of blame. if that's who he is, it's up to her to accept it or move on. i think it would be invasive to try and change who he is for her benefit.
but, most women would find that exceedingly unattractive.
