republishing inri034

this is another lost track that exists in a sort of an ill-defined alter-reality.

it came out of a jam in my basement that fall. i was feeling a little more lonely than usual. see, i was quite literally the only person in my social group that bothered doing grade 13. so, school was converted from my only real social grounding (and i was always an extremely introverted loner) into a place of isolation and alienation. i skipped a lot of classes, actually, in a desire to escape the people. looking back, i sort of regret not reaching out to the people around me a bit more; it would have helped in more than just a social context. but, in hindsight, i'm also able to understand the separation better as one of class; as much as i regret keeping myself isolated, i think i would have been better off not carrying on with school at all.

i mean, i did well. my average was over 90. but i felt hopelessly out of place. i knew i didn't belong there....that they would never accept me unless i became the kind of pretentious jerk i despised. nor did i want anything to do with them, anyways. i really hated the superior attitude that i found myself immersed within. so, i just kept my physical distance and my mouth shut, hoping the condition was temporary (it wasn't).

the flip side of this is that i was also working a part-time job in a fast-food restaurant and i hated it just as much. i didn't fit in any better there, amongst the kids with no aspirations in life except to work in order to exist.

so, i found myself stuck between worlds, not wanting anything to do with either. in both cases, though, what i found the problem was was the people. "i don't mind the job, but i'm repulsed by the staff".

what i really wanted was just to be able to lock myself in a room and never have to engage with anybody ever again. i think that i'm the only person that could have written this. it exudes my idiosyncrasies in surreal, tongue-in-cheek humour. but it's also dead serious.

"i'd rather have a book than a friend.
it's loyalty will never end,
doesn't succumb to fashion or trend,
and all the information it sends,
will never get lost along the way.
when things get as tough as they may,
it will always know exactly what to say,
'cause books don't hurt...
...or do they?"

musically, there's some fancy playing here. everything is completely live: no loops (except the drums, programmed into a 909 emulator). that guitar part is sort of tricky. and check the bass part in the breakdown.

the thing i really like about this the most, though, is the gorgeous kosmische ending section, which is built up on overlapping sixths and is just the most dreamy thing to escape into ever. dramatic ending chord care/of a day in the life.

and, indeed, this is the dramatic ending chord for inri.

written & recorded in the fall of 1999. originally released on inridiculous in december, 1999. split into it's own ep in january, 2014. remastered & finalized on sept 28, 2017. as always, please use headphones.

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1999, 2013, 2014, 2017). 

credits

released December 15, 1999

j - guitars, effects, bass, synths, sequencers, drum programming, flute, digital wave editing, vocals, production 

republishing inri031

this was initially a part of this record:
jasonparent.bandcamp.com/album/inrimake

...but it never really made sense to put it there. that's a remix/cover album, and this is two forgotten experiments. it makes more sense to spin it off here.

this track was meant to be a new beginning, but, instead, exists in a sort of purgatory. musically, it's radically different than anything else labeled 'inri'; thematically, it's a logical extension of inri. i really wanted this to be a fresh start, but in the end i had to leave it in the inri pile. in places it's sort of evil, in other places it's just a little too precious.

my dad swapped houses in mid 99. again. this would be a frequent annoyance over the next few years. i can date this clearly to the summer of '99 as the first thing i did in my new basement. that change of surroundings contributed to the feeling of wanting to do something different...

while it is an original track, it ended up on the covers disc for two reasons. first, the lead guitar loop that cycles through the track came out of a stoner jam session in the basement of a friend of mine. it's sort of hilarious to realize it took three years for another human being to get an influence here, even if it was a throwaway jam session. that was really just an excuse though. the real reason it was on inrimake, rather than on inridiculous, is that it fits in better with the prog theme of that disc than the noise theme of the other one.

the lyrics have been a problem since they were recorded. sex sells. shock sells. i had to psyche myself up to do it. it's all tied together, though. where was i going with this, anyways?

'99 was the summer between grades 12 and 13 ("oac"). yes, ontario had a grade 13. get your laughs in. it was actually a pre-university year. universities would take the grades from the "oac" year as the entrance requirements. we didn't do SATs or anything. most universities have something like this for "mature students"; the weirdness is in making high school kids do the extra year. a few places (like quebec) still have similar types of pre-university screening...

anyways, i'm going into the oac year and i haven't even really given the whole vocation thing a passing thought, other than to reject the idea of defining my life through the concept of labour. there were a few weeks in the summer where i had sort of decided not to go to oac at all. i was actually *excited* about escaping school, focusing on a minimum wage job and spending my free time smoking pot and writing music. i really didn't want anything more out of life than this. and, if i happened to get lucky and sell some records, even better. i was eventually talked down from this position through a process of bribery. that didn't magically construct vocational aspirations, though; i ended up overloading on oac credits for the simple reason that i didn't know what i wanted.

(i ended up grudgingly accepting entrance into a software engineering program, literally switched to cosmological physics within a few weeks, switched to math after that, then bounced around from music to english to women's studies and ...)

so, again, i'm stuck between grade 12 and 13 and really dreading what the future holds. finding a way to sell some music would be an escape from this. i concluded that, tactically, my best approach at the time would have been to focus on something sexually explicit that gains it's power from it's shock value. there's a bit of desperation underlying this.

so i wrote a sort of graphic depiction of sexual domination within a male homosexual context. see, the thing is that it isn't very convincing. it isn't very convincing because it's contrived for profit. i'm being bluntly honest about the logic that produced this track because seeing myself in the mirror like this actually had a large effect on me. once i realized what i'd created, i was completely disgusted with myself. in it's initial form, liquify was the first 3:36 of this track. it sat on my hard drive for several weeks, waiting for me to finish questioning myself - who i was, what i was doing, whether it was worth it.

i came to two conclusions.

the first was that contrived music sucks. i realized i wasn't going to get anywhere faking it, anyways. if i wanted to build an audience, the only serious approach i had was honesty.

the second was that, even if it works, being fake isn't worth it. i was rejecting the beaten path because i didn't feel i belonged on it. accepting some kind of Official Alternative Beaten Path wasn't solving anything.

so, i should just do what i want, and tell anybody that doesn't like it to fuck off.

the second part of this track flowed from that epiphany. it's a pure prog workout, discernible from 1972 solely in it's updated use of technology. probably for the first time, the notes really mean something to me, here. if you listen, you can tell.

the ending scene of the jim carrey masterpiece, the truman show, fades the track out. it's meant to document the importance of the film in helping me work through what i was working through. as of january 2014, i've mildly modified the track to fade out the truman show ending, which was just a little too cheezy & precious.

so, yeah. there's a few more inri tracks. but this is really the point where inri dies.

--

the first five minutes were initially a different track, and are split off here for the final version to document it. i didn't initially commit to this pairing; i always intended to finish the first section as a separate track. it really wasn't until 2014 that i finally decided against it.

the version that ended up on 'inrimake' was a slightly less finished mix than the version that i archived as mp3. i must have further altered the track between the time that i burned the inrimake disc (october, 1999) and the time that i saved the track to mp3 to archive (january, 2000). i didn't notice this when i edited the track in 2014. but, i've brought the newest version in for the final remix.

--

when i ran through the discography in 2014, i stopped on this track for a few days and ultimately had to admit defeat around it. i wanted to turn the vocals down, but the mix was simply too saturated to do anything about it; everything i tried had a set of unintended consequences, and it just seemed prudent to not touch it. i was able to get around these concerns for my final mix, which is dated to sept, 2017. i've also split the instrumental section off and given it the title that i used for early versions of inricycled.

recorded over the spring and summer of 1999. originally released on inrimake in october, 1999 (with an accidental phase reverse). the first section was modified further at the end of 1999. minimally altered and split into it's own ep in january, 2014. spliced further, appended to and finalized over sept, 2017. finalized on sept 28, 2017. as always, please use headphones.

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1999, 2013, 2014, 2017). 

credits

released August 1, 1999

j - guitar, effects, bass, synths, piano, loops, drum programming, vocals, samples, cool edit synthesis, sequencing, digital wave editing, digital effects processing, production

publishing inri030

this little sample collage went a long way over the years. in the end, it needed a home of it's own.

the initial collage, from september 1997, is actually the earliest computer music experiment that i have. years of enjoying playing 'civilization 2' by myself had me imagining soundscapes during events, and they began to arrange themselves in my mind, in patterns. if you were even alive in 1997, you might want to think back to the realities of technology at the time; i had a dial-up internet connection, minimal access to software and little idea of what i might be able to find on the internet. when i finally did find a shareware copy of cool edit '96, it became clear what i was looking for; before that, all i had access to was the default windows 95 software, which included the windows 95 sound recorder.

it would be harder to find this executable nowadays than you might think, unless you have a windows 95 cd (or perhaps a set of windows 95 floppy disks). it was clearly not designed for sound art, but it did have a crude copy and paste operation. really, it had some potential, it just lacked a tactile gui.

while the program was difficult to operate due to a poor user ui, i was able to take advantage of it to produce some interesting sound experiments that would be difficult to reproduce in any sort of other program. you could tell the program to loop or to slow or speed down samples, but you had to make a good guess as to where to paste it in - often with the aid of some napkin math. what i was able to get out of the program is perhaps wholly idiosyncratic, but i would not recommend it at all, not even in the conscientiously goofy retro sense.

really. don't do this. i plead of you.

once the background collage was completed, i initially intended to turn the track into a goofy electro-swing thing, with punk rock guitars, but i found the out from the computer to be noisy and the in from the 4-track to lack dynamics. so, sending the track to tape created too much noise and trying to record in over cool edit seemed to suck the life out of the guitars. i would later realize that this was gear specific: i was using a stock soundblaster from c. 1995 and a stock floor digital effects processor that needed to be warmed up by the tape. a version with vocals was recorded in january of 1998, but it was discarded in favour of the pure collage, which i decided worked well enough on it's own, in a quirky, yet subversive, kind of way. when i burned my first demo cd in june of 1998, i used the strict sample collage (shaped slightly for continuity).

i was assigned an electronic music project in the winter semester of 1999 and intended to use this track, as it narrates the absurdity of a war situation (and even kind of sounds like the 30s). however, i couldn't hand in the first part of the collage because it was lifted directly out of the sample. in the initial context it didn't matter - it was entirely atmospheric, purely conceptual - but it was imperative that it be removed in the academic context and be replaced with something i could assign myself writing credits to. so, i took an isolated experiment with score writing off of the first demo and fused the tracks together, creating a fully original hybrid written/sample piece. this was done twice due to reasons that i don't fully remember, but partly to remove the glitchy cricket sounds in the background; in the end, the second version did not have the sample overlays that the first did, which are only available in the 'early warning' version.

the track was remastered in 2013, along with the rest of the early material, but it didn't work out for any of it, in the end. at the end of 2014, i was able to recreate the originally intended version (with punk rock guitars) by taking advantage of a much newer soundcard, as well as noise reduction and digital mastering software. it was this version that was used in the reconstruction of my first record in january of 2016, but i again had to modify the lead-in; this time, i created an ambient sample collage to rise from the ashes of what i had to destroy.

meanwhile, the initial sound card experiment had also been dramatically updated by the newer technology. the lead track was created on oct 26, 2016 to simply explore the idea of what merging the two completed components together would sound like. in the end, it seemed necessary to release this, in order to be comprehensive.

the track is really more about mental journeys undertaken during long overnights of civ 2 than it is about anything explicitly anti-war, although the ideas intersect and the latter certainly evolved from the former. this is really actually a little bit of a window into what is going on in my own mind, as i'm conquering alien land masses at 3:30 on a wednesday morning.

this track was initially created in the fall of 1997 as an experiment using the windows 95 sound recorder. it was further expanded upon several times over 1998, resulting in several different mixes. a failed rescue was attempted in 2013, while a more successful rescue was carried out on a reclaimed full band version in late 2014. the track was further reconstructed and remastered for inri015 in january of 2016; the lead track was created on oct 26, 2016 out of material that had been remastered over 2013-2016. the ep was created on oct 26, 2016 but not released (and finalized) until sept 13, 2017, in order to properly fit into sequence. as always, please use headphones.

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1997, 1998, 1999, 2013, 2014, 2016, 2017). 

credits

released July 1, 1999

j - guitars, effects, bass, orchestral sequencing, windows 95 sound recorder, digital wave editing, sampling, production

the rendered electronic orchestra includes piano, electric guitar, orchestra hit, pizzicato strings, violin, viola, cello, contrabass and synth pad.

republishing inri029

this was my grade 12 final project in electronic music design. the assignment was something along the lines of creating a piece of music with a social message.

the message is part dystopian, but focuses more on the idea of identifying certain threats that would become a problem in the upcoming century. remember that this was the middle of 1999. how close was i?

1) intro
2) war
3) noise pollution, or pollution in general
4) conformity (or the collapse of individualism)*
5) chemical warfare
6) global warming
7) outro

* i was thinking in terms of personality/uniqueness, rather than something political. and i think the extreme conformity underlying gen y social attitudes have played this out frighteningly well, actually. it's a reaction to the radical mindset of anti-conformity that dominated gen x, but it's still a very real thing that will have very real ramifications in the upcoming decades. if you thought the 50s were creepy, wait until you see what these kids grow up into!

i should have included something about inequality. i also removed a vegan track, partly due to time restraints. besides that, i think i got all of the broad ideas right.

the piece is made to be played in an indefinitely repeated loop.

most of the tracks are slightly remixed/resequenced versions of tracks from inri or inriched. track 5 is brand new, and recorded on the school's synthesizer (part of the project requirements).

recorded over 1997-1999. constructed in this form in june, 1999. published in november, 2013. aborted early version added as a hidden track on sept 13, 2017; release consequently finalized. this is my third symphony; as always, please use headphones.

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1999, 2013, 2017). 

credits

released June 20, 1999

j - synthesizers, sequencers, effects, guitar, bass, piano, drum programming, noise generators, metronome, a broken tape deck, sampling, loops, cool edit synthesis, windows 95 sound recorder, sound design, digital wave editing, production

publishing inri026

i went through a string of extremely cold basements in the late 90s. it was half heating costs; on that level, i could even agree for environmental reasons. however, it was half because my step-mother legitimately prefers absolutely frigid, air-conditioner-level temperatures and didn't want hot air rising from the basement to ruin the freezing temperature upstairs. you can understand how that might get frustrating sometimes.

i was offered a room upstairs, but then i'd have to go to bed at 10:00 pm rather than stay up until 4:00 am recording music and chatting on the internet, which was clearly unacceptable.

the song is more than a surreal commentary, it is a morbid fantasy i was legitimately having. there wasn't any real chance that i was going to light the basement on fire; if i were to do that, i might ruin my guitar, and then i'd be worse off. the story runs a little off the rails, but that is it's charm.

this was the last song recorded for inclusion on my second record, inriched (inri021), and initially sequenced as the penultimate track (as the viewless/suicide sequence had already been decided upon as the ending track). the song was finished on the evening of the 5th; i finished the cover art on the evening of the 6th. it remained in that position, as the 14th track, from february, 1999 until jan, 2016 when it was split off for the technical reason that i wasn't able to remove the vocals because i didn't retain source material. this is frustrating, because it's by far the most interesting song on the record, from a musical perspective.

however, i've always viewed the track as transitional; i realized, even at the time, that i was starting something new rather than ending something, with this. in hindsight, the elaborate electro-prog explored by the track is certainly more similar to what would follow than what i was closing down. it is actually fitting that the track was removed due to a lack of source material, as that defines what i created over 1999 (which i'm retroactively labelling period 1.3).

as the track was still on inriched through 2013, it was remastered along with the rest of the record. a version was also produced for the deleted inricycled b compilation, which included some extra mastering and the removal of the opening sample. these versions were both mastered to fit into their respective sequences; while they're both improvements, neither really captured the essence of the track as it's own thing. so, a final standalone mix was constructed in sept, 2017 to permanently close the ep.

initially written and recorded in the winter of 1999. remixed in late 2013 and again in early 2014. this track was separated from my second record in january, 2016 but the single was not completed until it was remixed one last time in sept, 2017. as always, please use headphones.

this release also includes a printable jewel case insert and will also eventually include a comprehensive package of journal entries from all phases of production (1999, 2013, 2014, 2016, 2017). 

credits

released February 5, 1999

j - guitars, effects, bass, sequencing, drum programming, synths, vocals, loops, samples, digital wave editing